15 month LID Anniversary!!

Well today is our 15 month LID anniversary - I wish I could say I was more excited but unfortunatley I'm not. I had a dream last night that we were going to China tomorrow to pick up Mhyia. In my dream my parents were coming with us and we were driving to pick her up. I don't know which part is more unbelieveable, the fact that we were driving to China or the fact that we were going tomorrow!!! Anyways it was a nice dream while it lasted. I just can't wait to get to a month where I have less time to wait then I have already waited. I just wish I could count on some kind of a timeline - I use to think 3 years but when I look at the numbers and the way referrals are going I just don't see how it is possible? If I could at least count on a time of year I would be able to buy little things here and there like I use to but I can't even do that. I use to love thinking about buying things and doing a baby registry, decorating the nursery etc... but now it just seems like I will never get to a time when I feel confident enough to be excited.

As many of you know we had 5 miscarriages while trying to concieve and everytime we were told we were pregnant we always felt like we could not get excited - well that is how I am starting to feel about the adoption. Don't get me wrong I am so excited to be adopting and to be adopting from China because that has always been a dream of ours but I just don't know if that day will come when we feel confident enough to do all the fun things that come along with expecting a child?? Last night Mike said to me while we were talking about the wait "at least we can say we are in the middle of the pile of waiting people, or even better than middle". Well I must say that I had never thought about it that way before - I still always feel like we are at the end of the pile but we're not. There is approx 8.5 months to get through to reach us and there are approx 15.5 months after us so we are closer to the front than the end! I guess that is the way I should start thinking about it because for some strange reason it made me feel better!

Our 1st Christmas Party of the season!!

Well this past weekend we went to our annual Christmas get togehter with friends!! There are four couples and we all take turns having it our houses! This year was great - I was responsible for bringing dessert, which for anyone who knows me is pretty much the only thing I offer to bring. I love baking - cooking, not so much!

Last year Mike and I were shopping at Williams Sonoma (one of our favourite kitchen stores) and we bought this snowman cake pan. I decided that this years Christmas party
would be the perfect opportunity to try it out. Thank god I had actully tried to bake a cake in it earlier in the week because it proved to be a little tricky. Since my trial run seemed okay I figured I would go for it!! Well thank god it turned out okay - you have to bake two halves and then put them together which also worked out okay. Once the little guy was assembled and standing on his own it was
time to decorate him!! I must say I was quite impressed with myself because it turned out pretty good! It took me about an hour to do but he looked good so we headed off to the party. The drive over was a little nerve racking but he made it safely and he was quite a hit!

He didn't look so by the end of the party but he sure did taste good!! I love when I try new things and they actually turn out the way I picture in my head! I think I will have to make this again!!

Our first nephew!!

"Landyn Kenneth Philip DuFour"

Last Thursday Mikes youngest brother Andrew and his wife Kayla had their first baby - a boy!! This is our first nephew and of course he is gorgeous! He was born last Thursday night Nov 15th. Mike and I went to see him last Friday night and then we were in Mississauga again on Saturday for a seminar so of course we stopped in to see him again! We are so excited to have a nephew, we have two nieces that we love to death so this is very exciting! Here are a couple of pictures of him! Congratulations Andrew and Kayla - he is truly a gift from God!!!

Mommies in Waiting Dinner!

Last Friday night (Nov 9th) I went to another Mommies in Waiting dinner. The dinners are held every two months and mommies from all over the GTA and further come out and chat, eat etc.. it is such a great support group! This time we had 13 mommies and little Ava! We have mommies who are already home with their little ones, mommies who have just recieved referrals and then mommies like me who are waiting and waiting and waiting. Also we have mommies who are adopting from other countries too - not just China so it is always very interesting to hear everyones stories.

To be honest at first I wasn't feeling overly excited about going - it seems that any adoption news lately is always depressing and I was feeling like somehow I just needed to try to put the adoption to the back of my mind...yeah right, like that's going to happen. Well I went and it actually made me feel 100% better!! The drive in with Karen was great even though we were in bad traffic the whole time, it gave us time to chat and catch up. I am so thankful for my friendship that has evolved with Karen, I love to visit and talk with her and seeing Samara always makes me feel that it is only a matter of time before Mike and I will be home with our daughter!

Dinner was great, the company was great (Catherine is always so positive she made me feel better right away) and I left there feeling great - stuffed but great!

We always have a gift exchange at the dinner and this time the theme was "reading". I received "Goodnight Goodnight Sleepy Head" and "Five Little Monkeys" I LOVE them! I love both stories and I love books that are hard pages - much less chance of getting damaged etc..!! You can never have too many books - Mhyia will love them!

November Referrals are here!!

Congratulations to everyone who received their referral this month! The CCAA matched up to and including December 8th, 2005 which means that there is now 264 LID's left to match to get to ours (Aug 29, 06). I really have NO idea what this means anymore in terms of time?? Originally we were told 9-12 months (it has been 14 already) then we were told 14, then 16, then 18 then it went to 24 months and then it took a huge jump and went to 3 years and know I swear it is going to be longer although I am praying that it doesn't. Who knows anymore, I just wish I could count on a timeline so that I could actually start to get excited as we get closer but all that has happened for us is that it has continually gotten further and further away. I just want her here as soon as possible!!!