YY what a little peanut YY

Mike came down the stairs wearing a pink shirt and sweater he said it was in honour of Meghan - too cute!!!

YY what a little peanut YY

Mike came down the stairs wearing a pink shirt and sweater he said it was in honour of Meghan - too cute!!!

Me, Mike and my parents
My cousin and her new husband!!
Her dress was amazing!!!

Well I can't believe I am actually saying this but it has been 2 years since our LID of August 29th, 2006. It has been 2 years and 8 months since we started this whole process. When we started they told us 9-12 months, technically we could have been on our way to number 2 by now. It is more than depressing for us both, at first we were sooooo excited, I couldn't believe I was finally going to be a mom etc... I was planning the nursery, looking at baby items, picking up cute outfits etc etc.. Now it just seems so far away that even though a day doesn't go by where I don't think about it it is like a dream that never gets any closer. I can't put my life on hold but we feel like for the last 10 years this is all we have been working towards. After 8 years of trying and 6 miscarriages I was so sure that adoption was what was meant for us. We had always said we would love to adopt one day and we figured it was definitely meant to be but ever since we started there has been nothing but road blocks and slow downs. Needless to say we didn't really do any celebrating...for now it is almost a reminder of how long we have waited and how long we still have ahead of us. Sorry for this downer post it is just that I don't know how to be excited about it anymore??








Most recently (yesterday) I was sooooo sick, I went to bed feeling sick Friday night and I was sick all day Saturday. I have no idea why but thank god I am feeling much better today (so far). Of couse this weekend we had planned to work on the basement which I was very excited about because we are almost to the mudding and taping part!!! Maybe I will try today!
Thursday officially marked 21 months since our LID. I must admit that the whole adoption has become this thought of "something we wanted once" or "something we use to be excited about" Don't get me wrong I would be ecstatic if I new when it was going to happen or even if it was going to happen. It is just so ridiculously far away that I feel like it isn't even real. I think that is one reason why I am not up on my blogging as I use to be. I feel like "why am I doing all of this" it will just make it all harder in the end if something goes wrong?? I don't know what to think anymore. Mike and I want this more than anything but it seems like every time we start a new path to our dream of becoming parents something goes wrong - like this ridiculous slow down. I have just been thinking a lot about it lately and I just don't know what to do anymore?? Anyways we do have 21 months down and only god knows how many more?? I wish he would tell me!

A couple of weeks ago it was the MIW dinner. I can't tell you how much I have come to LOVE these dinners. I must admit that lately I feel like "what am I doing" going to these dinners for something that is sooooo far away and that I may never see happen? Going to the MIW dinners makes me feel like I am not the only one on this journey and I am not crazy for sticking it out!!Thank God I have Karen, her and I always drive in together and I always feel 100% better once I have gone. I feel so blessed to have found Karen - she always makes me feel better and I love seeing Samara - it makes me feel like this whole journey is more real and that it will eventually happen. This past time Mike (my Mike) went and hung out with Mike (Karen's Mike) and Austin. He had so much fun!! Mike and Mike seem to have a lot in common and get along great - something else I am thankful for!! I think as hard as this journey is for me at times, at least I have my MIW, I have Karen to talk to, I have my blog to write in etc... Mike doesn't have any of this so I am sooo glad that Mike let him come over and I am even more glad that they seem to get along sooo well. So big hugs and a big thank you Carmody family - you have no idea what your friendship has meant to the both of us!!!
Well I think this is all for now, I am going to attempt to do some drywalling!!



Well Mike and I set off to Home Depot on the Monday to buy wood, Tuesday we went on a hunt for material and beads (no luck). Wednesday I went on another hunt for beads and found the perfect ones thank God! Then we went back and bought the material that I had found the night before. It was my lucky day because the material and beads matched perfectly! Thursday we started assembling the wood and I started sewing, and sewing, and sewing... Friday I went and bought more matrerial because I used the other stuff up on a "prototype" for the top. Friday night we put on the first coat of paint and I continued sewing. Saturday we painted and sewed some more. Sunday morning we put it all together! 














