Christmas 2009!

Well this year I have almost 2 weeks off during Christmas which is sooooo nice!

For Christmas we go to my moms Christmas Eve go to church, have fun, talk, play games etc.. we stay over night and get up in the morning and open gifts etc.. and then eat a late lunch around 2pm - this works out perfectly because it allows us time to get packed get home, pack the car again and get to Lisa's for Mike's family dinner!

Christmas was great - I love being around all of our family, the older you get the more you just cherish those times and realize that your family is truly the most important thing you have.

This year with Mikes family we decided not to by gifts for each other and instead we adopted a couple of families through a local charity organization. We all put money in and got them toys, clothes, jackets, boots, and food gift certificates it was nice to be able to help others - it gave us all a nice warm and fuzzy feeling!

Christmas day was also the first time we actually got to see Ronin and hold him - he is such a little peanut - what a true gift!

Christmas morning getting ready to open gifts!

Meeting baby Ronin for the first time!

The happy new family - Ronin's first Christmas!

Landyn wants to see his new cousin too..

You may remember Meghan, our niece that was born Oct 15th - here she is now! Also her first Christmas! She has affectionately been nicknamed "Chubberella" she is sooooo freaking cute I could just eat her! - Mike and I seriously can not get enough of her!!

The two newest cousins!!

Emma - and the sweater that she wanted - I love it when you get something they love!!

Shayla and Meghan! Our oldest niece and youngest niece

Last but not least me and Meghan she is wearing a sleeper that says I love my Auntie - how appropriate!!

My job situation

As many of you know this time last year I was looking for work. Right after Christmas I got the job I currently have and I LOVE it!!! It is only a one year mat leave but it is in a field that I love and at a company I have always wanted to work at - I had hoped that something would come up and I would be able to stay. Unfortunately this week we heard from the lady on mat leave and she plans on returning at the end of Jan - because of the economy etc... they are not going to be able to keep me on at this time :(

As of Jan 30th I will once again be unemployed :( :(

Our new nephew Ronin!!

Well On December 15th our family was blessed with an early Christmas present - our new nephew Ronin!!

He was born 4 weeks early but weighed 5lbs 11ozs. He was in the NICU for a couple of days so unfortunately when we went to visit we were unable to see him but we were able to see a couple of pictures (below).

We now have a niece born Oct 15th, nephew Nov 15th and another nephew on Dec 15th - this makes things much easier to remember!!

Kevin and Kerith you have truly been given the best Christmas present ever - Congratulations!!!

27 month LID Anniversary!!

Well there really isn't much to say except we are one month closer to our little girl!

November 29th, 2008 marks 27 months since our LID.

In November they only referred 2 days.

MIW Dinner - November 14th

I try to attend the MIW dinners as much as possible. I must say that the last couple of times I just haven't felt up to going - I think that the wait is soooo long and I almost feel like it is something that will never come true. I feel like the more I do the more it will make it harder to cope if something happens to our adoption.

In the end I always ed up going if I am available and I am ALWAYS happy that I did. I LOVE driving in with Karen - we always have such good chats and it is so nice to have someone in my life to talk to who really "gets it" - this is also how I feel about all the mommies in waiting, once I am there I just feel like I am surrounded by people who understand and have the exact same feelings as I do.

It has been so nice to be part of this group and I cherish the dinners we have together!!!

26 month LID Anniversary!

We were away on our cruise during our 26 month anniversary since our LID - as always I can't even believe that I am saying that number. The sad part is the way things are going we have at least 26 more months to go. Oh well I guess everyday is one day closer.

I just don't know what to think anymore - will it truly ever happen?? I am starting to wonder?

Our new Niece!!

On October 15th Mike's youngest sister Amy and her husband Chris had their first baby! My new niece Meghan Veronica born at 4:42 a.m.7lbs 14oz. She is sooooo cute - of course I am probably biased but she really is soooo cute. We went to see her in the hospital that night. We haven't seen her since then because we were away on the cruise but I can't wait to see her again this weekend! Yahoo! a new cousin for Mhyia!!! It hopefully won't be more than 3 more years for Mhyia to be here and by then Meghan will be close to 3 years old and Mhyia should be around 1 so it will be perfect!!

YY what a little peanut YY

Mike came down the stairs wearing a pink shirt and sweater he said it was in honour of Meghan - too cute!!!

4 Posts in one night!!!

I went on a bit of a posting spree so make sure you scroll down and read them all!! More to come soon 10 sleeps until we leave on our cruise!!!

What a great Thanksgiving weekend!!

Well Thanksgiving weekend was absolutely perfect - sunny, not a cloud in sight!

Friday night we went to our friends house for a get together!! My girlfriend and her husband moved to Boston a couple of months ago so they were visiting, it was great!! We watched Sex and the City - Suzanne had made copies for us girls! I never really watched the series when it was on but I love watching them now and I love the movie. There are the four of us who always try to get together and have "girls night" it is sooo much fun and so great to be together! It is a little harder now that one of us lives in Boston but we will work with it!! It was great seeing you guys this weekend! We miss you!!


We went to my mom and dads for dinner on Saturday night and PIGGED out!! My brother and his wife were there and we had a great time. Pretty much all Saturday and Sunday we worked on the basement. We have been finishing it ourselves and although I love doing stuff like this it just takes too long. It is hard when you are busy every weekend! This weekend we accomplished a lot - we are priming now so next is the ceiling - we are having someone come in and do the California knock down - then we will be ready to paint, trim, doors, floor etc... I can't wait!!

Monday we met Mike's family for breakfast - it was great!! The only one who could not attend was Mike's sister Amy and her husband - Amy wasn't feeling great - she is pregnant and as of this evening is in the hospital delivering my baby niece!!! Yahoo can't wait!! By tomorrow I should be an Aunt again!!

My cousins wedding!

A couple of weeks ago we went to my cousins wedding, well actually my second cousin. It was absolutely beautiful, she looked amazing - the day was perfect!! I just wanted to post some pics and say congratulations to both of them!!! May you both live a long and happy life togetherYY.

Me, Mike and my parents

My cousin and her new husband!!

Her dress was amazing!!!

Another day???

A strange thing happened the other day? I was reading the Rumor Queen and apparently people with a LID of February 16th are receiving referrals. This is strange considering it is only one day and mid month - very out of the ordinary! It looks like some people have gotten their pictures etc... but some people are still waiting to hear more??? It is very strange - I would love to think that it was in some way a speed up but I feel very strongly it might have actually been a mistake? I guess over the next couple of days we will find out!!

Less than 200 LID's away!!

Well this month they have referred up to and including February 15th, 2006 - which means they did 6 days this month. I never thought the day would come when I was happy they did at least 6 days. I can remember when things first started to slow down I would figure out our wait time if they did an average of 15 days, 14 days, 13 days ect... I can can clearly remember thinking they will never go below 10?? ha was I ever wrong!!

So far this year they have referred 63 days (including this month) which is an average of 6.3 days per month. We now have 195 log in days to get to us which means if they could keep an average of 6.3 it would be 31 more months or May 2011!! It is not my best case scenario but as I have learnt...it could be worse, at least that is finally less than 3 more years. Of course i pray for some kind of speed up even if it is small!!

As I mentioned we are below 200 days!! Yahoo!!! I literally live for referral time!

Update on current Situation!

Sorry if I gave anyone the impression there was exciting news on the horizon - there isn't! I am trying to post more things and the other day I thought I better at least post the titles of things I wanted to post about or I would end up forgetting.

I got quite a chuckle that people left comments when I hadn't actually posted any info - I got more comments with no info than when I post info!! Thanks Karen and Catherine! It means a lot that you comment on the blog...more than you know!

Anyways on to the "current situation"... the CCAA has sent referrals to families with a LID of up to and including February 9th, 2006. It was very exciting in one way that they matched 9 days but on the other hand 5 of those days were Chinese New Year and no one has LID's for those dates. Either way it was exciting to see 9 days in one month gone!! This means that Mike and I currently have 201 days left before ours. So far this year they have matched an average of 6.33 days/months...if this trend continued until our referral we would have 31.75 more months to wait which would be May 2011. of course we pray that things continue at least at this rate and any speed up would be greatly appreciated!! By the time we get our referral it will be close to a 5 year wait from LID - it is beyond sad and depressing.

I have been looking at the referrals that came this month and some babies are so young and some are 2 and 3 years old?? I know that some people request an older child but the one couple requested a baby and got a 3 year old???? I can honestly say that I would be upset if that happened to us - for one I have always wanted a baby, we have no children and I feel like I would be missing out on something if I didn't experience what it is like to have a baby. Also you prepare for this referral and the preparation for a 3 year old is much different that the preparation for a baby. Crib vs bed, clothes, toys etc.... but also the emotional and developmental issues that come along an older child. I don't think it is fair to the children or the parents. The CCAA says that everything they due is in the best interest of the child, well I just don't understand how they justify this?? Anyways again I am ranting so I will stop and try to think of happier things!

2 Year LID Anniversary!

Well I can't believe I am actually saying this but it has been 2 years since our LID of August 29th, 2006. It has been 2 years and 8 months since we started this whole process. When we started they told us 9-12 months, technically we could have been on our way to number 2 by now. It is more than depressing for us both, at first we were sooooo excited, I couldn't believe I was finally going to be a mom etc... I was planning the nursery, looking at baby items, picking up cute outfits etc etc.. Now it just seems so far away that even though a day doesn't go by where I don't think about it it is like a dream that never gets any closer. I can't put my life on hold but we feel like for the last 10 years this is all we have been working towards. After 8 years of trying and 6 miscarriages I was so sure that adoption was what was meant for us. We had always said we would love to adopt one day and we figured it was definitely meant to be but ever since we started there has been nothing but road blocks and slow downs. Needless to say we didn't really do any celebrating...for now it is almost a reminder of how long we have waited and how long we still have ahead of us. Sorry for this downer post it is just that I don't know how to be excited about it anymore??

Michael's 40th Birthday!!!

info and pics coming soon!!

2008 Summer Olympics in Beijing

The Olympics officially started on August 8th, 2008 (8/08/08). In case some of you didn't know the number 8 is a very lucky number in the Chinese culture. The opening show for the 2008 Olympics was nothing short of spectacular. I unfortunately didn't get to see all of it but the parts I did catch were amazing!! I am not crazy about the Winter Olympics but I love the Summer Olympics!! The Gymnastics, Diving, Swimming, Track, Trampolene etc..

There have been rumors that perhaps the Olympics could be the blame for the slow down in referrals this year? I don't know if I believe this rumor or not - although I would love if it were true? The organization of this event has been massive, the dancers, choreographers, security, construction workers etc etc etc.... so a part of me likes to believe (hope) that things do pick up a little after all of this is over! Here are some beautiful images of the event.

23 month LID anniversary!

Well I am about 2 weeks late posting this but better late than never. It was officially 23 months since out LID on July 29th, 2008. It is sad to think that we should have already been home with our little girl - but now we are still waiting and we will be waiting for approx. 3 more years. There really isn't much else to say other than I pray to God that somehow things speed up!!!

Yes I am Alive!!!

As usual it has been way toooo long since my last post. I don't know what it is lately but I am just so bad about posting and posting on others blogs etc... I think it is just sooooooooooo far away that it seems not real and therefore it seems like I am doing this for nothing?

Since last post we hit our 22 month LID anniversary. We spent Canada Day with our friends the Carmody's which was very fun!! We went to Family Fun day with the kids which was great and then we had a BBQ which was absolutely delicious!!! Great BBQing Mike!!! It was a lot of fun to spend time with them and especially to see Samara because that makes us feel like eventually it will happen for us too!!! I will post some pics from this later!

I am trying to think of what else is new?? Two of my sister-in-laws are pregnant which is VERY exciting but also a little hard at family celebrations. It is hard when everyone around you is living though the one thing that you want more than anything - don't get me wrong I am thrilled for them but it is still hard at times.

Mike and I are still working on finishing the basement. We are currently mudding and taping so there is a light at the end of the tunnel and we can actually see it!

Last week Mike and I met our new social worker - who we like VERY much!! Our original social worker moved to the States and since we have to update our home study this month we had to find a new one. Anyone who knows about our original social worker will know that I am not at all upset about having to get a new social worker. Our original lady was very nice but not as on top of things as I would like.

Well I think that is it for right now!! I will try to post some pics from these events above this week!

Once again it has been a loooong time!

Well once again it has been a long time since I have posted....I know...I know...shocking! Well obviously lots has happened in the past couple of weeks. I will work my way back.

Most recently (yesterday) I was sooooo sick, I went to bed feeling sick Friday night and I was sick all day Saturday. I have no idea why but thank god I am feeling much better today (so far). Of couse this weekend we had planned to work on the basement which I was very excited about because we are almost to the mudding and taping part!!! Maybe I will try today!

Thursday officially marked 21 months since our LID. I must admit that the whole adoption has become this thought of "something we wanted once" or "something we use to be excited about" Don't get me wrong I would be ecstatic if I new when it was going to happen or even if it was going to happen. It is just so ridiculously far away that I feel like it isn't even real. I think that is one reason why I am not up on my blogging as I use to be. I feel like "why am I doing all of this" it will just make it all harder in the end if something goes wrong?? I don't know what to think anymore. Mike and I want this more than anything but it seems like every time we start a new path to our dream of becoming parents something goes wrong - like this ridiculous slow down. I have just been thinking a lot about it lately and I just don't know what to do anymore?? Anyways we do have 21 months down and only god knows how many more?? I wish he would tell me!

This is more of a cheery subject - A couple of weeks ago I was on Lea's blog and she was doing a draw for the cutest little china girl. I put my name in and didn’t really give it a second thought (I don't usually win things). Well you guessed it I WON!!! Lea sent her off in the mail and I got her a week or so ago. I took pictures but have not got around to posting about it. She is really so cute and the little tin she came in is also really cute! I actually took my winning as a sign to stick it out!! So for know I am holding on to those thoughts. Thanks Lea, I love her!!!!

A couple of weeks ago it was the MIW dinner. I can't tell you how much I have come to LOVE these dinners. I must admit that lately I feel like "what am I doing" going to these dinners for something that is sooooo far away and that I may never see happen? Going to the MIW dinners makes me feel like I am not the only one on this journey and I am not crazy for sticking it out!!Thank God I have Karen, her and I always drive in together and I always feel 100% better once I have gone. I feel so blessed to have found Karen - she always makes me feel better and I love seeing Samara - it makes me feel like this whole journey is more real and that it will eventually happen. This past time Mike (my Mike) went and hung out with Mike (Karen's Mike) and Austin. He had so much fun!! Mike and Mike seem to have a lot in common and get along great - something else I am thankful for!! I think as hard as this journey is for me at times, at least I have my MIW, I have Karen to talk to, I have my blog to write in etc... Mike doesn't have any of this so I am sooo glad that Mike let him come over and I am even more glad that they seem to get along sooo well. So big hugs and a big thank you Carmody family - you have no idea what your friendship has meant to the both of us!!!

Well I think this is all for now, I am going to attempt to do some drywalling!!

This past weekend!

Well I guess I will start with the bad news first. The CCAA has only matched 3 days this month. I just don't even know what to say or think anymore. When Mike and I started this journey I/we were so excited we just couldn't believe that we were FINALLY going to be parents after trying for so long and after so many losses.

We started in Jan of 2006 and were told 9-12 months after our file went to China. Well our file has been in China for just over 20 months now and we were thinking it would be approx 3 more years. It is ridiculous if you ask me, I just don't get it? I don't understand why this is happening? Are we just not meant to be parents? Mike will be 40 this year and I will be 35. I know that there are a lot of people older than us in the IA program but for us it is just taking too long. If we have to wait three more years (good case scenario) and then another year before you could apply for a second child Mike will be close to 45 and that is the cutoff for a lot of programs if you are requesting an infant.

I just feel like our lives have been on hold for the last nine years and it isn't getting any better. I just wish there was a crystal ball I could look in and know that everything was going to turn out and that we would be parents. I/we have considered switching programs but it is a VERY hard thing to do. We have always dreamed of adopting form China (regardless of our situation) and I can't imagine us not going there but I also can't imagine us waiting 3 more years or more to go?? China has only matched an average of 5.8 days this year and at that rate it would take us another 39 months. That is CRAZY!!!

I just don't know what to do?? I feel like I really can't do anything right now because of my job situation as well. I am only on a 1 year maternity contract and I hope to be able to stay on after that but you just never know?? I LOVE working there and I can't imagine working somewhere else but again only time will tell.

Well enough depressing news, lets get onto something more exciting!! Our niece Emma had her first Communion this weekend and she looked so beautiful!! Mike and I were watching the ceremony at the church and we just can't believe how grown up her and Shayla are!! I swear it was yesterday that Lisa was pregnant with her. The both had readings to do and they did so good! We were very proud of them.

Below are a couple of pictures of Emma after her First Communion! She is so pretty!